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How Overusing Your Strengths Can Derail Your Success

We often celebrate our strengths as the core of what makes us valuable at work. Empathy, kindness, drive, ambition—these are attributes we’re encouraged to develop and showcase.


But what happens when these strengths are dialled up too high? What’s the flip side of these traits that are usually seen as positive?


Understanding the 'other side' of our strengths is crucial, as even the most admirable qualities can become detrimental to success when overused. We’re all prone to this challenge, whether it's through over-relying on our natural abilities or pushing them beyond their beneficial limits.


The dual nature of strengths

Consider empathy, kindness, and emotional intelligence. These are undeniably positive traits, but when they’re overused, they can lead to issues:


  • Empathy can turn into over-identification with others' problems, making it difficult to set boundaries and causing emotional burnout.

  • Kindness might lead to being overly accommodating, resulting in the inability to assert yourself or prioritise your own needs.

  • Emotional intelligence could manifest as reading too much into situations or overanalysing interpersonal dynamics, which may cause unnecessary stress.


Traits like drive, ambition, and perseverance are often celebrated for their role in achieving success, but can have a 'dark-side' when overused:


  • Drive can lead to aggression and a ‘win-at-all-costs’ attitude, potentially alienating colleagues and damaging relationships.

  • Ambition might transform into dominance, causing others to feel overshadowed or undervalued.

  • Perseverance can morph into stubbornness, where an excessive focus on goals overlooks the need for flexibility or collaboration.


How to recognise when you're overusing your strengths:

To ensure that your strengths are serving you well rather than working against you, self-awareness and reflection are essential. Here are three key areas to consider:


  1. How do you use your strengths when stressed?

    Reflect on how your strengths manifest under pressure. For instance:

    • If attention to detail is your strength, do you find yourself micromanaging tasks and stifling your team’s autonomy?

    • If collaboration is your strength, do you become overly consultative, potentially slowing down decision-making and progress?


  2. Have you received any feedback relating to your strengths?

    Feedback from others can reveal whether your strengths are being overused:

    • If assertiveness is your strength, have you been told that you come across as abrasive or overly aggressive?

    • If being a team player is your strength, has feedback indicated that you take on too much, to the detriment of your workload or personal wellbeing?


  3. Do you over-rely on your strengths?

    Consider whether you rely too heavily on certain strengths, which may lead to gaps in other areas:

    • If compassion is your strength, do you struggle with having tough conversations or addressing difficult issues?

    • If independence is your strength, do you find it challenging to work effectively in team settings or collaborate with others?


Strategies for balancing your strengths:

Managing your strengths effectively requires ongoing effort and self-reflection. Here’s how to ensure your strengths work for you rather than against you:


  1. Discover and understand your strengths:

    • Use tools and assessments to identify your strengths and understand them fully. This awareness will help you leverage them appropriately and recognise when they might be overused.

  2. Practise self-Awareness and reflection:

    • Regularly reflect on how your strengths are impacting your work and relationships. Consider keeping a journal to track instances where your strengths might be tipping into overuse.

  3. Seek constructive feedback:

    • Actively seek feedback from colleagues about how your strengths are perceived. Use this feedback to adjust and balance your approach.

  4. Be present and mindful:

    • Pay attention to how you respond to different situations and notice any patterns where your strengths might become overwhelming. Adjust your behaviour as needed.

  5. Take breaks and recharge:

    • Give yourself time to step back and reset. This helps prevent burnout and allows you to return to work with a balanced perspective.

  6. Push yourself out of your comfort zone:

    • Experiment with new ways of approaching tasks and challenges. Trying different strategies can help you develop new skills and avoid over-relying on familiar strengths.


Harnessing your strengths can be incredibly empowering, making you feel engaged and fulfilled in your work. However, it’s crucial to be mindful of the potential downsides of overusing these strengths as it can be detrimental for your career success. Embrace the complexity of your strengths, and use them wisely.

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